granny panties

The other day I called my grandma to see what she wanted for Christmas. Here's our conversation:

Me: What do you want for Christmas, Grandma Jo?
GJ: Oh. Well. Hmmm. I just don't know ... oh! I need panties!
Me: ... (stunned silence) ...
GJ: Size ...
Me: Pick something else. I'm not buying you granny panties!

I'm sorry! I just won't, and that's all there is to it! No one should ever have to buy panties for their grandmother.