i'm gonna be rich! rich i tell you!

This is different than any of the other Nigerian money scam emails I've received (I'm glad they're showing a little creativity these days!) I've bolded the best parts for ya:

FROM Senator J.C Briggs
DIRECT MOBILE (234-803-5412457)


Dear Sir,

I am Senator C.K John Foreign payment adviser to the president Federal Republic of Nigeria, Sequel to the secretive arrangement in regards of the shipment of your contract sum, I wish to inform you that all necessary modalities have been automatically concluded and has left Nigeria to Europe via there stop over unit in Express Cargo Flight With Air And Sea Diplomatic Company.

Note carefully that the content of the boxes is "MONEY" but I did not disclose it to the Courier Services as Money, rather I informed them that the boxes contain Vital "DIPLOMATIC DOCUMENTS" belonging to my client (thats you).

Furthermore, the weight of the consignment is 80kg which cost 9,900.00 Euros to deliver to Europe since I don't have your full mailing address to avoid mistake of delivering. On no account should you disclose the content of the boxes with the Diplomatic Courier Services for fear of betrayal. So do not allow them to know that the content is money.

In the meantime, contact the Diplomatic Courier Services Mr. Mike Williams. E-mail:diplomatic_cargodelivery@yahoo.co.uk tomorrow to know the actual situation with the consignment then get back to me as soon as possible so that the shipment documents with the keys can be dispatch to you, also you can arrange with them for delivery to your address if you cannot go to the designated office in Europe for the claim.

Meanwhile, I will be coming over to your country immediately the consignment arrives in your home/bank for my 20% share.

Congrates and remain blessed.

Best Regards,
Senator J.C Briggs

--Is he Senator J.C Briggs or Senator C.K John? Or is that Senator C.K John Foreign?
--"Express Cargo Flight With Air And Sea Diplomatic Company" is the longest and weirdest and most nonsensical company name I've ever seen — what does that even mean?
--"all necessary modalities have been automatically concluded" ... huh?