how to beat the DMV

Thanks to my genius friend Shy, I discovered a workaround for the aforementioned bastardized government service we call the DMV. I thought I should share it with you, since it's something I never knew, and you may not either.

Join AAA. For about $70 bucks (a $20 joining fee and a measly $50-something annual fee), you can become a member of AAA. That means you can renew your registration through them. In other words: YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO TO THE DMV EVER AGAIN. Can you hear me jumping for joy through the very words on this page? Because I am.

There happens to be one of those handy dandy AAAs two or three blocks from my house, and they're open until 5:30, which means I can make it there before they close. Upon hearing that I could do it there, I jumped the earliest possible shuttle home, stopped in, joined, walked up to their "DMV Stuff" desk (no line), spoke to the (very nice & helpful) lady behind the counter, and renewed my registration. They have the stickers and everything!!! They do only take cash or check, so I found out how much it would be, ran to the ATM next door, and came back with cash. $411 in cash, mind you - thank you, SF parking cops with an overblown sense of what constitutes CITY SIDEWALK vs. MY DRIVEWAY!!! But that's a whole other story...

Let me just let it be known that I think it is pathetic that we have to resort to private businesses to do what a government service is supposed to do. I say if that's the case, shut down the DMV and privatize the whole damn thing. If there was competition in that arena, we could expect at least a modicum of service from these agencies. But there's not, so we can't.

Now children, what is the moral of this story? That's right! Fuck the DMV. Join AAA.