i got lasik

The Friday before the week of Thanksgiving, I got LASIK surgery. I had severe astigmatism, and farsightedness, so I needed substantial correction.

Since I don't mind wearing glasses (I actually feel kinda naked without them), I took the plunge for one reason -- JR and I were finally taking a real vacation; 10 days in Negril, Jamaica, and we were leaving on November 30th. I wanted to be able to actually see when I was snorkeling for the first time in my life, and I wanted to just buy cheap-ass sunglasses off the rack. I can't wear contacts anymore, so that left one option. That Friday was the first time they could do the surgery on me, and it was also the last day possible I could get the surgery done in time for vacation. You have to wait 14 days before you can swim, and I'd be at exactly 14 days the day we arrived in paradise.

Unlike anyone else I've talked to, I didn't get any Valium or Vicodin, and I was pretty peeved by that. I was getting LASERS zapping my eyeballs, and I wasn't getting anything to calm me down, OR anything for the pain afterwards??? WTF?

I didn't have the miraculous experience that most people have, walking out and seeing crystal clear on the way out of the office post-LASIK. I was pretty sick afterwards - the pain exhausted me, I couldn't stand any light, and I had to fill my eyes with gel and antibiotic and anti-inflammatory drops every hour. Shannon stayed with me that day, and she was so fantastic. And then she left me the sweetest note. Thanks, Shannon!

I had to wear goggles at night so I wouldn't rub my eyes while I was sleeping, and my eyeballs were really dried out - I was putting eye drops in my eyes probably every 15 or 20 minutes. The worst side-effect was the glare at night - everything had a glow, and on top of all that, I was still having pretty blurry vision. I'm still dealing with that.

It looks like the reason I'm still having problems - blurry, double vision, and trouble switching from looking at close stuff to far stuff (after messing around on my iPhone for a while, I literally cannot focus when I look up) - is because the surgery didn't completely correct the astigmatism. So he needs to do additional surgery in about 2 months. That one will be on his tab. I didn't pay so much money to still end up needing glasses. Plus, it's in his contract. :) It's just gonna be a pain in the ass to go through that all over again.

So there you have it - my LASIK story. I am typing this post from the car while JR is driving, and I am wearing cheap-ass sunglasses we bought at Target. That's what it's all about. That, and being able to read the shampoo bottle in the shower.

winston home post-surgery

Winston Post Surgery, originally uploaded by jforsythe.com.

Seeing him come out like this was a shocker. We knew they'd shave his ears and part of his face, but we didn't expect he'd look like he's had brain surgery. He's totally bald, and he's been through hell. We're not sure if he can hear yet, and the left side of his face is temporarily droopy, but he sees us and we've gotten the occasional tail-wag.

We just love him and we're glad he's home.

poor winston

All night last night Winston STUNK. He smelled like ass. We couldn't figure out why - he'd just had a bath and we'd cleaned his ears, so - because I INSISTED he truly smelled like ASS - we washed his butt. But he still smelled putrid. At about 12:30am, JR leaned over the edge of the bed to pet him and scratch his head and neck, and he YELPED! And yelped again! Any rubbing on his neck or ears made him emit a piercing yelp. It scared both of us.

JR flipped up his left ear, the ear he has a growth in, and where it's always been a huge fleshy, sometimes blotchy mass and an unending amount of ear wax, is a bloody, completely black, massive growth, sticking out of his ear canal. And the stench is enough to make one gag. No wonder he'd hardly wanted to move for 2 days (we thought he'd hurt his leg).

We jumped up, got dressed, called the emergency vet specialists (that have been working W's health toward being able to fix his ears) and rushed him over. Occasionally he'd muster the energy to shake his head vigorously or try to scratch the growth out of his ear, but mostly he just laid on our laps.

Once we were finally seen, the verdict was "Yup, he needs to have that surgery *immediately*, but we don't have surgeons overnight." I just wanted them to snip that horrible mass off and stitch it up so he didn't go septic or something. I just couldn't contemplate how something that looked and smelled that bad was OK to leave attached to his little body for another minute! She said that's what necrotic flesh smells like. BLECCH! They sent us home at 3am, with the hope that the surgeon could fit W into his schedule today. They called at 7:30am with the OK, and we took him in.

It's 3:26 right now, and the doc just called to ask if it was OK to go ahead and remove the other ear canal at the same time (as we'd originally planned). Hell yes it is! Let's see - getting one ear done will cost $2500, which means getting the other one done later would be $2500 too. Or they could do them both today and the cost would be $3000. So thank god they're doing that.

The surgeon was heading into surgery with him as soon as we got off the phone. Send him your best vibes, please, because he is the sweetest, gentlest dog of all time. They'll call when they're finished to let me know how he is. He has to stay there overnight to recover, and we can go get him sometime tomorrow.

He's gonna be in for a rough recovery, with probably almost no hearing left. But he'll be free of this chronic horrible ear infection forever. Hallelujah!